Carib Beer XI vs IBM,

Greenwich Park, Tuesday 18th June 2024

The Caribs fourth match of the season was at a slightly gloomy Greenwich Park but with no sign of rain so no cause for any Caribs to be wishing for rain to have the game called off. Carib Moss and Ringer Neethu arrived a good 30 minutes before everyone else so tasked themselves with setting up the pitch which took around 15 minutes so they then rewarded themselves with a hard earner beer for their efforts. The other Caribs then slowly arrived just before the planned start time with Carib Glen straight away losing no time in promoting his MGGA (Make Glen Great Again) campaign by criticising Carib Moss for said beer, no doubt hoping to win votes at the end of the year from the yet-again-absent Carib skipper Haigh.

With IBM showing even more tardiness than the Caribs the toss was finally dispensed with and IBM were to bat first. Perhaps showing some disregard for Carib traditions and constitution a unilateral decision was made to enter the 21st century and use an electronic scoring system. This generally went well with perhaps some discussion over number of balls faced by each batter (a hot topic to which we will return to later).

The Caribs opened the bowling with Caribs Archie and Swanand who were able to keep things reasonably tight against the best batters of the IBM team in a quiet opening 4 overs. The first change pair bowlers were Ringers Kunal and Neethu, both recruited from the old BoE cricketing academy, once a hotbed of Carib talent but sadly rarely tapped into in recent years. Kunal showed some decent pace but it was Neethu who was to make the break through removing IBM opener Ben. IBM skipper Jack was next in but was clean bowled leaving Ringer Neethu on a hat-trick. There was a suggestion that to follow Carib tradition this should mean Neethu should be removed from the attack, fortunately he was allowed a hat-trick attempt but was denied by IBM star plater Haaris. A long partnership then ensued with both IBM Alex and Haaris retiring on 25 not out. Even Carib Phil was not able to make a breakthrough despite a vociferous lbw appeal of course given not-out by relentless not-outer Carib umpire Lee.

Ringer Vishal had finally arrived by this point and was immediately thrust into the attack to bowl 4 overs straight through. With the better IBM batters now out Ringer Neethu was able to pick up another wicket from a caught behind to Carib Weaver who took 2 out of 3 caught behind attempts in the innings for a decent performance behind the stumps. Ringer Vishal was also able to snaffle a wicket and Carib Moss, bruised from being tonked to all corners of the ground in his bowling performances so far this season was even able to bowl an economical over. This meant IBM had just reached 3 figures leaving the Caribs a seemingly modest looking target of 102.

Caribs Holmes and Rishi, our most frequent openers of the past few seasons were sent in with run scoring tricky against the best bowlers of the IBM attack. The score was just 6-0 after 3 overs, Rishi was finally able to break the shackles with a fine boundary but then was swiftly dismissed at the end of the fourth over. Carib Moss was sent in at 3, triggering an extremely hectic period of play. Carib Moss having watched the dot-ball fest of the previous week when the Caribs were chasing 150 and had lots of wickets in hand took it upon himself to up the run rate by any means possible, which meant taking as many quick runs as possible. The IBM change bowlers were now serving up wides on a fairly regular basis, but Carib Moss soon saw an opportunity for some quick runs calling through Carib Holmes for a risky second run with poor Alex run out by his partner. Carib Northern Pie Magnate Cordey was next in and brought about memories of old hitting his first ball for four.

However the hectic running was far from over with Phil encouraged by Moss called for another risky two, running himself out. Carib Archie was next in and Carib Moss, unable to help himself or learn from the previous mistakes, or think that the run rate wasn't that high, called through Carib Archie for a highly risky bye, the shy at the stumps just missed, reprieving the Carib batters. Carib Moss remarked he could have been part of a surely a Carib record of three consecutive run-out wickets. This proved prophetic with the very next ball with Carib Archie buying in to the suicidal running, with Moss being run out the very next ball.

Carib skipper for the day, perhaps wanting to calm things down after this frankly mad spell with the Caribs well up with the run rate but already 4 wickets down, 3 by run out, sent in the new Carib dot-ball supremo Carib Glen. However Carib Glen was not able to match his efforts of the previous week and was quickly bowled, albeit after taking a quick 2, and being equally quick to point out his high strike rate to anyone who would listen for the rest of the evening (MGGA).

A short period of calm followed with Carib Archie and Ringer Kunal taking us along to 55 in the 9th over, so ahead of the required run rate. Carib Archie was dismissed but Ringer Neethu joined Kunal and the two ringers took us up above 70 with 8 overs to go. So only 32 needed from 8 overs at this point. Just when it looked like the Caribs might be able to hang on and grind out the win the match took another ultimately final turn. IBM Richard returned to the attack and decimated the Carib lower order, taking the last Carib 4 wickets in his final 2 overs with the assistance of some slightly low bounce, but leaving himself with a five-fer. The final denouement was delivered in the form of an lbw decision given by relentless not-outer Carib Umpire Lee, who described the decision as 150% out.

The Caribs had lost by 24 runs with a whopping five overs still left to bowl. The top scoring batter only making seven runs, possibly another Carib record. At least this afforded the opportunity of an early finish and more time in the pub, where all those in attendance where treated to some more MGGA propaganda ad nauseum.

Carib Beer XI Lose by 24 Runs

Scorecard